The phrase "sleeping with the boss" has a lot of connotations. A rumour of an employee sleeping with the boss is enough to raise a slew of questions, and it has the potential to impact the workplace environment - and not always for the better. Having a personal relationship with coworkers can be difficult, and it can be even more difficult if it is with a superior.
While some jobs discourage employee dating and others explicitly prohibit employee-supervisor relationships, there are still boundaries that exist regardless of the rules in any given workplace (for example, sexual harassment policies state that sex cannot be used as a condition of employment or promotion).
However, sleeping with the boss is not an uncommon occurrence. We investigated the workplace dynamic surrounding these sexual connections and their repercussions via the perspective of over 1,000 employees. Let's look at the potential professional and social consequences of sleeping with the boss.
Superior Seduction
First, we examined how many respondents were hit on by a coworker or a manager. Over 35% indicated they'd been hit on by a coworker, whereas only 9% stated a management had tried to court them. However, a sizable 27 percent indicated they'd been hit on by both, while 28 percent stated neither a coworker nor management had attempted to flirt with them.
The replies were then separated by gender to examine if men's and women's experiences differed in any way. For example, more women than males reported being hit on by both bosses and colleagues, whereas more men reported never being hit on by either. When asked if they'd been hit on by a manager or other superior, males outnumbered women by nearly two percentage points, with more men affirming than women. Furthermore, men were 32% more likely than women to believe that it was acceptable for a manager to sleep with their subordinates.
Finally, we investigated whether there were any differences in reaction by industry. When asked if they had ever slept with their employer, slightly more than half of those in the construction industry said they were fine with it, while less than a quarter of those in government or public administration said it was fine. Women are clearly underrepresented in the construction business, accounting for only around 9% of the entire construction workforce. This could be a part in the industry's overall perceptions, at least in terms of getting active with the boss.
Relationship Reactions
We then questioned respondents if they had ever known of a coworker who had slept with the boss. A whopping 58 percent agreed.
We followed up with another question: what would you do if you discovered one of your coworkers was having an affair with the boss? Most participants answered they would do nothing; in fact, more than 64% claimed they would keep the information to themselves. However, not everyone would choose to remain silent. Sixteen percent said they'd tell another coworker, and slightly more than 11 percent said they'd email an anonymous tip to their HR department.
Less often mentioned comments were even more direct and fascinating, with roughly 6% stating they'd try to sleep with a colleague, 4% attempting to extort their boss, and slightly more than 3% writing about it on social media. What considerations motivate individuals who want to sleep with a colleague who slept with the boss? Are they aiming for business leverage, or do they believe that this information makes their coworker more approachable?
In addition, 40% of employees admitted to being attracted to their boss or other superior at some point throughout their employment - but had not followed through on it.
What Happens Next?
We now understand why people slept with their bosses. But we need to know what happened as a result. Surprisingly, the most frequently mentioned outcome was that the employee had another hookup with their boss (40 percent), indicating that the first get-together was not an isolated event. And a sizable proportion of respondents - more than 25% - reported developing an intimate relationship with their supervisor, with 22% reporting that their boss's attitude toward them improved.
Other positive outcomes from this situation included a wage raise (15%), promotion (13%), and a larger bonus (8%), although it wasn't all good news. Some said that their coworkers spread stories about the tryst (11%), that HR had to intervene (just under 8%), and that they were demoted as a result.
Bringing Love and Work Together
We're now getting to the employees who have had affairs with their bosses. According to our poll results, 28% of employees had done the deed with their employer. 27 percent of women and 28 percent of males asked admitted to sleeping with their boss. While the causes for this gender gap (or the sexual preferences of people involved) are unknown, it is possible that male supervisors are less likely to establish contact with their female subordinates explicitly due to fears of sexual harassment charges (although both men and women can be the victims of sexual harassment). Furthermore, research have revealed that men overestimate their sex partner estimates, whilst women keep a more concrete track of their partners. We also looked at the various management levels to see if there was any disparity in workplace sexual harassment. By far the most likely to engage in this behaviour (about 34 percent) were those who identified as general managers, with associate-level personnel close behind (around 26 percent). Entry-level managers were the least likely to engage with their staff on a personal basis (approximately 19 percent).
Finally, we looked into which fields were more likely to have employee-management meetings. Overall, the top three industries for sleeping with the boss were hospitality and food services, technology, and wholesale and retail. Those in government and public administration were the least likely to have sexual relations with their superiors.As previously said, there is a delicate line between genuine, work-related praise and sexual harassment, and crossing that line can be dangerous, especially for those in positions of authority. What appears to be a compliment to an underling can actually be disrespectful or viewed as harassment, therefore employers must keep comments genuine and performance-based. The most frequently mentioned "hint" (reported by approximately 55% of employees who slept with their boss) was that the employer was continuously laughing and flirting with them. The next most common occurrence was far more direct: about half of those polled reported their supervisor invited them to hang out outside of work.
Other prominent markers included fun or erotic body language (46%), physical contact (44%), frequent praises (33%), and 28% said their supervisor gave them preferential treatment. There are numerous reasons why employees choose to sleep with their boss. Interestingly, men were twice as likely as women to sleep with their employer in the hopes of gaining a promotion. However, the most common reason for meeting with a boss was simply sexual attraction (cited by over 66 percent of respondents). A close second (52 percent) stated they wanted to have a good time, while nearly 22 percent said power was appealing. Twenty percent admitted that both parties were inebriated during the event. Less typical explanations appeared to involve aspirations for extra benefits. Twelve percent said they slept with their boss to get a pay boost, and 11 percent wanted a bigger bonus - the same number also wanted a promotion. Around 10% slept with their boss in order to earn more vacation or sick days, 8% intended to help a colleague get a raise, and 7% slept with their boss in order to help a buddy get recruited.
What Happens Next?
We now understand why people slept with their bosses. But we need to know what happened as a result. Surprisingly, the most frequently mentioned outcome was that the employee had another hookup with their boss (40 percent), indicating that the first get-together was not an isolated event. And a sizable proportion of respondents - more than 25% - reported developing an intimate relationship with their supervisor, with 22% reporting that their boss's attitude toward them improved.
Other positive outcomes from this situation included a wage raise (15%), promotion (13%), and a larger bonus (8%), although it wasn't all good news. Some said that their coworkers spread stories about the tryst (11%), that HR had to intervene (just under 8%), and that they were demoted as a result.
Bringing Love and Work Together
Finally, we pondered how workplace romances affected the relationship between the employer and his or her employee. The professional connection can vary as much as the personal outcome of a workplace romantic experience. Fortunately, the news is generally positive, with more than 51% saying the relationship remained the same and 34% saying it improved. The same is true for job satisfaction and stress levels - the majority of respondents who slept with their employer claimed that everything remained the same or improved. However, there is one noteworthy remark on stress levels: while around 45 percent of respondents said their stress level remained the same, the rest were split between "more stressed" and "less stressed." This could be related to the variety of office romances and how people react to new partnerships. Even if the work relationship does not change, dealing with any real or imagined fallout can be difficult (especially if one party is hoping to keep the encounter a secret).
Work is getting busy. We discovered that sleeping with the boss is not uncommon, with 28% of respondents admitting to have done so. The reasons for doing so were numerous, and while some may argue that getting a charge to notice you're interested in them may cross the line into sexual harassment, our poll takers agreed that the outcome was mainly A-OK for the majority.
However, while some people do sleep with the boss, the vast majority do not. While the effects are frequently neutral or beneficial, a small minority of people do not express a pleasant reaction once the deed is completed. As a result of their tryst, some people may feel it easier to leave their job, thus investigating new job opportunities (and beefing up that resume) may be on their radar.
Limitations and Methodology
The information reported in this campaign was acquired through the use of online questionnaires administered by Amazon's Mechanical Turk. Participants have to be currently employed to be eligible for the surveys. Our team performed three independent surveys for this study: one to discover the percentage of employees that slept with their boss, one to determine the reasons and outcomes of sleeping with their boss, and one to inquire about the reasons and outcomes of sleeping with their boss. The visuals depicting the top reasons, top results, and change in life quality after having sex with the boss have a minimum sample size of 233 respondents who admitted to sleeping with their boss. Respondents were rejected from the poll if they answered an attention-check question incorrectly or supplied inconsistent information.
To see if there was any change in professional relationships, job happiness, or stress levels, participants were asked to rate their professional relationships, job satisfaction, and stress levels before and after sleeping with their boss.
Each aspect was rated on a seven-point scale by respondents. Our team determined whether one scenario resulted positively, poorly, or remained the same based on this sequence.
Sources
https://www.doi.gov/pmb/eeo/Sexual-Harassment
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/opinion/commentary/ct-boss-capitol-hill-women-gender-chaperone-perspec-0520-jm-20150519-story.html
https://hrdailyadvisor.blr.com/2018/03/20/office-romances-fallout-breakup-can-cause-headaches-road/
http://www.chicagotribune.com/lifestyles/sc-fam-what-is-sexual-harassment-1121-story.html#
https://www.bls.gov/opub/reports/womens-databook/2016/pdf/home.pdf
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